Heylo.
I have just made a bargain with my parents. I am now allowed to have my DDR back and some out time on the weekends.
HOwEveRRr..
My weekday internet priveleges have been revoked. There is no way around this considering my dad has been trained in FBI computer farenzic (spellingk?) courses and can find out exactly what i've been doing, where and when i've been doing it, and under whose name i'm operating and if its me lying about it. The man is a freaking genius who will not be thwarted. Therefore, further blog entries and responses to other peoples blogs have been restricted to the weekend and from school. In the end, I believe the bargain worked out in my favor.
I <3 ramen. I just made myself a bowl with some eggs and parmesean cheese in it. Oiishiii!! Ramen must be eaten with chopsticks. No exceptions. It tastes better and is much more anime esque. It also forces you to slurp ^_^.
mmmmm mmm! *smack*
Next saturday!!!!! Tae kwon do open house. 1-4. I shall be working there, being friendly, saying hello, and demonstrating my kung fu form and engaged sparring with Chris Dematto the hotto. He is also buying me lunch :-D!!!! I came back out from changing after kung fu class to find chris and my daddy having an in-depth conversation. Apparently chris plays the saxophone. Baritone, at that. Chris-dawg also went to LaSalle. Makes sense. Many people say that decent guys don't live in this area, save for a few. But thats not really true. The majority of them just go to LaSalle. I met several hot ones at a kiwanis meeting last year (LaSalle has a circle K club). Yyyow! Chris actually lives on the same street as Marley and Becca, yet somehow neither met him in a neighborlike manner. Marley had a short run with the tae kwon do thing, and she was pretty cool. I remember her ki-haps (loud kicking noise) fondly. Hai! hehehe marley.
So come to my open house! It will be fun. If you're interested in taking tae kwon do, that would be the time to do it considering i get "paeks bucks" (i.e. pro shop gift certificates) if one of my friends signs up. Momma needs a new stack of boards! ..Or a pair of nunchucks with a chain. Or a practice sword. Oooo tiger balm...j/k.
"Man, we should put that kid on a george forman grill. You know, how the fat like runs off the sides.."-Chris. Discussing a particularly chubby student. You'd find this mean, but actually every chubby person i've observed coming in that place has gotten visible weight loss results within months. The studio is pushy, but not ballet-studio pushy.

A tribute to Downtown 81

"The story which you are about to see is not true, but it isn't false either. Any resemblences to real life are purely magical".
These are among the first words spoken in the movie Downtown 81. Which isn't a movie. Its a picture hanging on my tv that doesn't stop moving that has a title. Its a room in an art museum. Where the analytical folk of society, the leaders have put it in "the art movie" box. The word art makes sense. The word movie makes sense. But the way we interpret the word movie does not. An art movie is still a movie, meaning it's recorded on film . But the reason few people "get it" or "understand" is because they forgot the word art. If you see an art movie and try to find a plot, you are immediately lost. Of course it's trying to tell a story. Otherwise it would never move. But its not trying to tell a story that happens in life, its trying to tell a story of life. Every frame or scene represents an emotion. Every abstract image shows that life balanced on random events. The setting sets the mood, the action explains the mood.
By the way, if you are among those where art movies just are weird and don't make sense, stop reading because this blog will probably make a lot less sense. Downtown 81 crawls into my mind and makes me spout ideas.
If this movie was an art gallery you'd see contemporary art that was shapes and sounds representing emtions. There would be no still lifes because a boot does not represent a boot. The analyticals would see the art, and take it as contemporary art. Therefore, it doesn't make sense. But it represents life. And life doesn't make sense or add up. Which is why it's so confusing.
A movie that is a portrayal of a situation is literal and easy to except. A movie that represents life doesn't go in any box because life is boggling, strange and most people "don't get it". Why are we here isn't important. It's important that we are here and we have to stay here.
"I feel big because i'm a part of the landscape which is big"
If you realize that you don't understand life, you'll understand the movie and that its about life. You'll understand it, simply because you don't understand it. Life is random. So is this movie. Life is strange, bizarre, full of random scenes and emotions settings and moods shifts of luck crazed theme music that shifts constantly every once in awhile punctured by a profound sentence or happening that changes it.
If you see this movie as a picture of life progressing, it will make total sense really.
If you see this movie as a story that happens in the real world you will see Jean-Michel Basquait getting out of the hospital, getting evicted from his apartment, selling a painting, going to a lot of clubs, finding and losing a girl, and getting a lot of money. Many random music scenes, odd characters that have nothing to do with anything are thrown into a plot that was never meant to happen. The acting isn't good. So if you try to see this movie regularly, it will be a shitty movie with a thin plot.
But if you see this movie as life you'll know they don't act because in life you don't act, you are real. If you try to act, you do it badly. Random things happen in life totally based on luck that don't have a lot to do with eachother. Random emotions pop up. If you symbolize these emotions or moods with people, they will be very strange.
"it's just a movie".
Well, in a sense it is just a movie. But have you ever walked through an art gallery and seen a disturbing painting, or one that arouses a lot of feeling, has a lot of bright colors and hurts your eyes? Nobody has ever said "it's just a painting" because a painting is real and it happens to you. It makes you see things. A titled painting shifts your perspective. Downtown 81 is a movie in the same sense that a painting is a painting.
So much truth. A brain rolled on film. A soul compressed into a camera.
And yet the larger portion of the world does not accept it or know it.
Which is not a problem really. I'm not going to say "the world would be a better place if everyone saw this movie". Because honestly we all make different sense of things. And its choices, like seeing, undestanding, or viewing a movie from a certain perspective, that make us different. If people weren't different, the world would suck. And this movie would lose its campy underground charm.
Downtown 81. An impossible thing. If you want to buy it or see it you'll have to tear apart some independent video store or go to amazon or ebay and pray. Or borrow it from me, on the risk of ruining the cassette will endanger your life.
Anyone who I've told that their poetry or words has stuck in my mind and wont leave needs to pat themselves on the back, because that means I value their art in the same way I value this movie as a potrayal of life. Whether or not I took the time to write this huge long thing about it is another issue all together. In a sense this compliment is in my mind for everyone I've said that to, but I've never had time to say it.
By the way, Jean Michel Basquait, the star of the movie, is a painter. Check out his work. You probably wont like it. Which doesn't matter. Because whatever you think of it, its true. And sometimes the truth is boring or ugly. Which is why opinions on art are so diverse. Because some people can't accept the truth. And the truth could be one of those contemporary paintings with two black lines on it. Its boring, but its real. So its art. An expression of truth. Which is why I value all art, whether or not its pleasing to the eye. It may not be beautiful or profound, but its real which makes it worthwhile. You can discover a lot about life by walking through an art gallery and seeing every painting as a truth, sarcasam, or irony. Because very few people paint lies. Which is why anciet christian art isn't always the greatest, because some of the painters never felt in their heart it was the truth, but it was what they were paid to paint. Why student art isn't great, because they were given a specific assignment and what they drew was filling in the blank of an openended question. And some people don't want to take time to truly answer it, just fill up the space. So they bullshit the answer. And it looks bad. Portraits are true because when they painted the person, the person talked, was there, and was real. Still lifes are truth. A boot is a boot. Surrealisim is true. Because a giant apple taking up a whole room is what was truly in Magritte's mind and what he thought and felt.
Art is real. That is why this movie is good. Because it was placed as art and made to be real.

"I was struggling. But that was okay, because that's what artists are expected to do"-Jean Michel Basquait.

That was a long blog entry I know, but theres a lot on my mind after watching that movie.

Ok. I have my pills back, therefore I am ok. Its an odd feeling. I realize how empty my mind has been since I started taking luvox. Its a nice quiet in some ways. Aye, pills..
Anyway, I learned how to throw a football! It looks pretty and spirals and only goes in one direction, which i rather like!
In my insane fit a couple nights ago, I mentioned Chris was Italian. He is. Chris Dematto. ooo la la. Once again I mention I do not harbor a crush on Chris (or Jared for that matter) but I appreciate pretty men in my life. Makes things like chemistry and tae kwon do less grueling. Also Chris (as mentioned on green eggs & satire) has possibly the nicest ass I have ever seen. woooo.
Someday this may get back to him, but it will not be entirely embarrasing because I don't actually have a crush on him.
Imaginary conversation:

Chris: Hannah, did you say on a tape you gave dan that I had a nice ass?
Hannah: Yup. You put little debbie to shame with those honey buns!

Wherupon he will be more scared or me than before, which is really not a problem. Makes life more interesting when you can control a 22-year old man with fear. AHAHAHAHA.
By the way, I stayed home for a mental health day. I needed it. My heart kind of felt wrong and I was more tired than I had been in days. I needed a sleepathon and a pint of chocolate milk. So i went up to my parents.
LYING'D!!!
owww my intestinal tract...
So they gave me some kaeopeptate and sent me to bed. This actually did make me sick, so in the end i got my just desserts. O well *goes to retrieve DDR from no longer secret hiding place*

"Then that play-doh eating hussy burst into a cloud of purple smoke and popped out the ground like a daisy!"-Excerpt from me and Andrew Mcginely's collaboration story for relentless.

I CANT STOP RUBBING MY EYES!

HOLY SHIT!
FUCKFUCKAHAHAHAHAH *Goes into hysterical fit of giggles*
Chris is italian! I have socks! The marching band can't come to my party! Pills! FUCK! Pills! BAD LSD TRIP! ALICE IN WONDERLAND
Ahaaahhahahahahahahahahahahhahahhahahahahaha
*sleep*
I've been like this all day. When i don't take my luvox/aderol, all hell breaks loose it seems. I am completely lethargic and drunk and depressed feeling, then one little thing will set me off and i'll start laughing hysterically like an idiot and cursing and my hands shake. I kept thinking about jumping out of windows or ripping somebodys face off. I've laughed so freaking much today. And running. Holy shit! SHIIIT!
And then the girl spilled some milk, so the old man jumped off a ladder and broke his neck! HAHAHAHAH FPIUHNEROIUNFOIUENfnuIUNOIUNCeenenfnfcne
HOLY FUCKIGN SFIJnien!!FUNHEOUIbfoejbhcfuogvuhycfbioleuhfojun Then I go back to lethargic but something else will set me off like fiuahviune HOLY FUCK I"M GOING INSANE! DIE CRAZY! SHIT! SHIIIIIIITIITITTTTTT!!!!!!

"MEIOUNOIVUNeiunfunenh!!Infioun!!!NEuifnuincnvn!!!!"-IJDNEUyfneuyncbyehbyubhufb!!! FUCK!! FUCK!!!!!!

Thank you Brett. You've filled out nicely too!
..weirded out...
Anyyway, went over my tae kwon do instructor (Becky..not chris..)'sss house and taught her how to play DDR. Apparently she wants to incorporate it in an aerobics class. Huh. W/e. My DDR got unconfiscated for the hour, so that made me happy. And i got to meet Becky's three kids and see her large housestrosity. Her father invented Cold-Eeze. She teaches tae kwon do to "keep herself busy". Heh. Wish I was an heiress.
No i don't. Then i'd have to go to a stupid school with preppy rich children.
Financially, i'm happy where i am. We all want things, but you know i'm just fine really. I want my DDR back, but honestly i'm having an Ok time without it. Making tapes and all. Writing. Doing art. The finer things in life. Climbing trees. I am down to about 1/2 an hour of TV a week. Mainly because I hate it. Too many commercials. However, should you ever slide across a copy of Downtown 81 in a store of some indie nature (It wouldn't be caught dead in a bockbuster) buy it. It's worth a watch if you enjoy crazy 80's music and art and new york and graffiti and jean-michel basquait and storylines that don't go anywhere but mean everything.
Earwax.
"To Err is human, to blame the other guy is even more human"-I forget. Mr Jacobs had it up today. He never quotes zappa, which annoys me.

Do you find yourself enslaved by your parents doing menial house chores alot? Are you lazy and just don't feel like doing it, but you don't want to get in trouble either? Does it take you hours to do anything? Well fear no more, because I have developed a comprehensive list of everything that makes housecleaning fun, easy, quick, and funky!
*hem hem*

The Necessary Tools for a Lazy Teenage House-Wench

-Windex Multi-Surface with vinegar. Does mirrors, glass like most windex, but it also gets wood, countertops, and smooth ceramic (toilets). Works verry well on anything smooth.

-Scrubbing bubbles in an aerosol can. This. Crap. ROCKS!!!! It makes cleaning fun. No lie here. Bathtub, counters, floors, anything thats not a window or mirror gets its ass bubbled. You spray it, and its a clear spray for a fraction of a second, then BAM!! It fluffs into this freaking amazing white bubbly shit! The more you spray, the more it poofs. Its the kind of stuff you have to write your name with. Its so great. Fizzle fizzle! I FUCKING LOVE SCRUBBING BUBBLES!

-"The Boss" Eureka bagless vac. Little. Yellow. Different. Its small, light, and gets floors and carpets. And you don't have to change the head attatchment. This buddy is my best friend and companion for "hannah vaccum the entire house". Fraction of a second compared to the big gray monstrosity i'm supposed to use. That thing looks like the telletuby vaccum and probably weighs the same.

-Pledge "grab it" wet with collapsible mop thingie. Floor wizard! Gets into the cracks and makes everything clean and shiny. Plus you don't have to using a goddamn bucket. I HATE THOSE FREAKING SLOPPY BUCKETS. They can screw themselves in the ass with a warthog. And then relax afterwards by drinking a crap mold festering fuckshake. Bastards.

-Lysol wipes. Get the counters, make em smell pretty, disposable.

-Vitaminwater. Not a cleaning supply, but good for keeping you focused and energized without making you all hyper. Unlike gatorade, which is what it gets compared to tastewise. Gatorade costs less, but it has a lot more sugar which makes you crash afterwards. More calories too. This stuff is gaterode without the yucky sugar-water taste. And it's got some interesting flavas. Reccomended: Fruit Punch (revive), Strawberry Kiwi (focus), Dragonfruit (energy).

-Funk music. Always. Keeps you cleaning with a bounce. Funk music is without a doubt the music nectar of the gods. Healing, soulful and FUNKY. No other genre will ever recieve the same status in my mind. If it ain't funk, i don't want it. So get the funk out of my face. Recomended bands : Jamiroquai, Thicke, Primus, James Brown, Tower of Power, The crusaders.

That is how i clean my house.

"You have such a nice tan! Look at me! I'm tanorexic!"-Guy from queer eye for the straight guy.