so ends the sam chapter in my life..le sigh. But I'm unwilling to
a) give up his friendship
b) give up the relationship with my family. Because no matter what, I'm stuck with my family. urk. If breaking up with him is what I have to do to keep seeing him as a friend and to keep my family in line..then it has to be done.
Of course I can't find a guy I like and go out with him. That'd be too easy.
So..whoever you guys are (theres two now) you won. But you'll be happy to know that nothin illegal was even happening in the first place, seeing how the age of consent is 16 in PA. And the whole sex store on south street thing...I walked him in there not the other way around. Not like pervert 22 year old takes naive little 16 year old, more like Hannah goes OO! SEX! *runs into store* *sam followed*
BUt..
this is the end
my only friend
the end
Guh. Tuck and roll Hanzor, tuck and roll..
So! RHPS this weekend :-D!! Major plus in Hannahland.
Information tidbit..the female orgasm averages on 21 seconds longer than the male one. Pretty cool, eh? good thing we don't have penises. Count out 21 seconds plus a regular penis orgasm. that'd be one hell of a blast, neh?
Rocky Horror, Rocky Horror, Rocky Horror
lalalalala...
fuck my red belt test is next week O_O euww..
gnight.
 
" I like how the christianity section goes right into the asian section..like a paradigm shifting without a clutch" Gonna missya sammy-babe.
 

Dear friend,
You know who you are. You attended KT's party. Who knows whether or not you read this.
Why? Was it necessary? Does my life really mean that much to you? or was it an accident? Did you just mention in passing conversation that the only person I've ever had treat me like a sane human being, the only person I've EVER been compatible with, happens to be 22. To your parents you mentioned that. Or did you tell them? Were you worried about my safety? After meeting Sam, were you that dense to think I couldn't take care of myself? Noo, I don't think any of my friends are that dumb. Of course you're still my friend. I'll probably never figure out who you are. Except now because of your probably innocent action or slip of information, I now have to make a phone call to a kid who hasn't had a relationship in three years, and his last relationship was a Christian fundamentalist who treated him like total shit, I have to call this kid and break his heart against MY MOTHERFUCKING WILL. Your fault. Innocently. You will not get landed with this karma. or maybe you will. Because in the next 6 hours I have to call someone I care about and make him cry. Because you couldn't mind your own goddamn business. I know you think you did the right thing. I feel sorry for you because of that. I feel sorry for my parents because of that. But all I can tell you is you didn't do the right thing. Not at all. You were MOTHERFUCKING wrong. wrong wrong wrong. And its not going to hurt me. You're hurting a man who committed no fucking crime against you. All he ever did was fall in love with me. thats it. I am going to believe the best about you. All you did was casually mention my relationship to your parents and they flipped out. Thats what I'm going to believe. That is all. You are my friend and I am glad you care about me. But you have done something terrible in this..and I feel sorry for you that you couldn't look deep enough to realize that I was fine. Just. Motherfucking. FiNE. My forgiveness is boundless. If you feel the need to apologize to Sam, his phone number is 215-687-0290. And you should. You destroyed something he cared about and he didn't even know you. Its not just our relationship you totaled, no..I'm not allowed anywhere NEAR him now. You just fucking totaled our friendship you SNAKEY sonufabitch...
ugh. Whatever. I forgave you. Really. It was probably an accident..but please. Never try to protect me again, whoever you are. You obviously don't know how to handle a social firearm.

well, so I'm back to square one thanks to the anonymus stagatory rape tipper that was present at KT's party. To spell out exactly what happened to everyone except potentially that person who is now reading this, somebody mentioned sam and I to their parents, the parents called my parents, my parents flipped shit, there is now a metaphorical restraining order.


I am bitter. Its an irrational human emotion. Whoever you are, stay away from me. I will do something I am going to regret. Everybody on the suspect list is near and dear to me.

Save me from myself.
Sam..no, i don't want to call you and make you cry..
Life is the fucking antichrist.

"Wait! Why was professor Utonium making little girls in the first place?"-Arfenhouse.

My days only come in weeks. Therefore I post everyday.
I disturb the shit out of me.
I finally watched Donnie Darko. Dude..do it. Fucking amazing. Inspired a mass riot between my personalities. I won. I feel good now..talked to my mom. I'm not sure if she knows that I've never actually talked to her before now. And unfortunately for me I'm going to have to relive tonight in therapy tommorow..cover up the giant, gaping hole with leaves once more..
Peace is good. Arfenhouse makes me giggle. Its on newgrounds. Look it up.
Let's do the time warp again..
So! My mother is suspicious of Sam and I because she sucks. I don't care. I finally talked to her. True, I lied through some of it, but I actually did get to talk to her for once. Shes a very calloused woman. Calloused and ignorant. How have I managed to put up with her? Nice, indeed of course shes nice. Her hearts in the right place. But she's helping me with problems I'm not having and not helping me when I ask her for help.
I'll get over it. Maybe. No..i rather like it this way.
Hi Ryan. I missed you.

"Did you just call me a fuckass?"-so watch Donnie Darko. Thats the moral.

A lot of my parents' friends are dying. I feel nothing. This is really starting to disturb me. Nothing at all..
KT's party was last night. They all got to meet sammy ^_^ true, I could see judgement written on many a face, but Ryan approves and thats all that matters.
I don't feel like elaborating on that one. I like to think that people leave my blog disturbed or weirded out. Or at least giggling. But whatever. Try living with my mind.

Hannah: *looking for the listerine* wheres the..
Brain: Breathalizer?
Hannah: *looks up at browline oddly* its not a breathalizer, its-
Brain: Mouth detergent?
Hannah: um..no..
Brain: Mouthwash!
Hannah: Yeah! That's the one..

Ai freaking ya. And it doesn't help I'm a fucking split personality.

H2: What could I do to make them laugh..
H1: You're 8 years old. You are only going to try too hard and say something corny and annoying at the wrong moment. Most likely they will not listen. And don't try to imitate me because you can't do it. Just let me talk.
H2:NOOO!
H1: Yess you retarded page of cups just die you little fucking naive child..

Indeed. I am brutally insane. But if all goes well by the end of the month I'll be brutally insane with a congressional award, a finished reading program, a lovely boyfriend, and a Red Belt.

Urk.

Jennie: I should just make my boyfriends audition and show me a picture of their penis.
Hannah: Headshot?